extra lessons (diary 1986/02/19)

Last week Mr. Jones told us about solving algebra equations with variables. I did not understand how to calculate using letters. Lucia, helped me understanding, she is one year older than me. Last night we practiced until morning because of the math test today.
I don't know if I passed the test, it was really hard. Some of my results simply must be correct! Melanie, my friend did not feel well after this exercise. She has similar problems as me, but she did not practice that night.
Last time she failed the exam, if she does again, Mr. Jones would make her taking extra lessons. These lessons are not a pleasure at all. Its in late afternoon or evening when the other kids have spare time. These lessons are held by the older girls, which are very disrespectful to us and they often use discipline during lessons.
When I had to do extra lessons in history some weeks ago, I had to learn lots of silly things. For example 100 dates from european history. When I was asked for them I had to take off one piece of clothes per mistake I made. At the end I was there almost naked. I didn't like it, but it worked. I never will forget for example 1914-1918: first world war.

the silver necklace (diary 1988/02/12)

It was cold this day, we came from class at 5pm. It was some time left to do our homework before we left for supper. At 6:45pm on time we had to sit at our dedicated table in the dining hall. We could get some food and drinks and were allowed to eat until 7:15pm. If someone was late there was no way to get some food this evening for her.
At 6:30pm we were dressing up for dinner. Susan, the blonde girl from my room, was searching for her necklace, she liked very much. But it was not at the place where she had done it. She asked all of us if we had seen it - no one did. When Mrs. Derovich came, she told her what she was missing and Mrs. Derovich asked again. No answer.
She decided to search all our wardrobes, we had to put all our things out to be inspected. 10minutes later something fell out of Luisa's clothes. Susan recognized her necklace and took it back. It was about 7pm now, we would not get supper today. Mrs. Derovich was very angry ablout Luisa, she asked her how Susan's property could appear in her wardrobe. Luisa did not say anything.
Mrs. Derovich told her to take off her skirt and her panties. She had to bend over the table. Susan had to go for a cane. A collection of different canes have been in the headmasters office. Susan should choose one of them that would fit the offense. Some time later she returned with a very dark cane, it was about 3ft long and looked very firm. All four girls had to sit on the bed and watch while Mrs. Derovich caned poor Luisa about 15 times very hard on her naked butt. She cried like a baby, Susan smiled.

It was a very impressive experience for me. I think the combination of beeing spanked and beeing humiliated in front of the victim of the offense is very effective. I have often used this combination to my kids if they have argued. When Julia was very rude to her smaller brother he often is allowed to choose an implement that I use to discipline her. And the other way round. Its amazing to watch each of them picking that implement which he or she hates most.

to the movies (diary 1988/05/14)

At the weekend we were allowed to go out. We could go to the small city 4 miles away. It was a one hour walk or 15 minutes by bike. When we got a bike from school we had to bring it back until 8pm. My friend Melanie and I went to cinema by bike once. We watched "Hansel and Gretel", the movie was very new in this year.  We liked it very much.
On our way back to school I unfortunately had a flat tyre, we walked then. So we were back at school about one hour late. We tried to creep in very silently, putting the bikes behind the school house. I found a window on first floor standing open, so we could entered the house tiptoe to upstairs and to our room. Mrs. Derovich was already there watching out for us and waiting. Strongly bending her beloved rattan cane she looked very angry. We apologized for beeing late and she accepted our apology about the flat tyre but "rules must not be broken" she said. For beeing late we would not be caned, but we had to clean all school bikes in our spare time the following week.
It seemed to me Mrs. Derovich was somehow disappointed...

writing a diary

One of my room mates, Bettie had some trouble with staying dry at night. She sometimes wetted her bed, in particular when she got trouble during classes. Until age of 10 Mrs. Derovich thought Bettie needed a srict hand to stop this problem. She made her writing lines and gave her lots of extra work. But on some days a month Bettie still wetted her bed again. Later she had to wear diapers while sleeping. It did not solve the problem. Then she got very long handspankings over her knee. Everytime Bettie cried like a baby and promised never pee in her bed again. But it did not work.
Mrs. Derovich decided to consult a doctor. Two times a week Bettie had this appointment. He talked a lot to her and gave her a diary where she could write down her fears to get them out of her head. In fact writing diary was not allowed - I never understood this rule - but here it was a medical treatment, I think. Some months Bettie used the diary and she did not wet her bed again. At the end the doctor took her book and throw it away, so Betties fears went away and never came back.
This time I wanted to write a diary, too. Next opportunity to get a diary was some days later when I was shopping, I bought it.

five girls in a room

Most of my time in the orphanage I shared a room with four other girls. That was my best friend Melanie. She was a cute girl with brown hair, dark eyes and just one month older than me. She was one of my classmates, too. Another one was Bettie. Bettie was a bit younger, not very tall but quite heavy. She was very clumsy, all the time she did something wrong, forgot or lost something. She was okay but nobody really liked her. The other two girls were a bit strange. Both about one year older than me. Luisa a very naughty girl always broke the rules. She often run away, she smoked outside the school and visited partys in the city. She often was punished but she did not stop doing that. The other one, Susan was a real bitch. She was very nasty, always she told lies or she was tricking other kids.But she looked really good. Susan was a very good friend to the older girls which supported our governess keeping us in line.
In 1986 summer I was very hot - about 36 degree Celsius. I was 12 years this time. Susan told us that the headmaster decided it was too hot for classes, we could go swimming. Very happy we went to the lake some miles away for a funny day. Susan did not come with us. She was in class room - we got to know some hours later... When Mrs. Derovich, our governess, asked we told her everything, but Susan denied. We had bend over the desk, Mrs. Derovich lifted our skirts and dropped our panties. Each of us got 12 strokes with the cane for staying away from classes and 12 stokes for lying to her.

school uniforms

We got school uniforms that we had to wear all day. Uniforms were collected every week for laundry. We had to take care that not all clothing got dirty before laundry day. It was not funny sitting in classroom with a dirty skirt for example.
When I was in the age of 7 it happened to me. We played outside in autumn in rainy and muddy conditions. Next day in maths lesson Mr. Jones recognized my skirt showing dirty spots. He immediatedly stopped lesson and asked for the reason. I could not really find a good one. Mr. Jones made me taking off the skirt and continue all the day without it. It was terribly embassing for me to sit there or walk around in panties... Fortunately my panties have been totally clean. I would have to take them off too, if it was not.

One of my class mates - it was Paula - had to do this some weeks later. She played soccer in the break and her clothes was very dirty afterwards. During Mr. Jone's lesson Paula had to take off her shoes, t-shirt, skirt and panties. She was not allowed to leave the classroom for changing clothes. So she must stay the whole day almost naked. She was so ashamed, she cried all the time. I did not really feel sorry for her, she often argued with others, she deserved it.

not permitted

Rules and punishment are used to keep kids in line. At our school the following is not permitted

• smoking 
• drinking alcohol 
• missing curfew 
• running on floors 
• eating in living rooms 
• making noise after 8 o'clock in the evening

The staff took responsibility that we follow the rules. How they got the job done was very different. For example:
Mrs. Polenta - a governess - usually gave us lots of extra work like mop floors, sweep courtyard, cleaning restrooms. Mr. Jones - our teacher for maths and history - used very special methods of humiliating us. Sometimes he slapped us. Mrs. Derovich - my governess - loved using her cane.

By the way, there was a cane in each class room. Some teachers used it others did not but it was a good way to keep rules in mind. The classroom canes where different, smaller ones in rooms for youngsters and senior canes in upper classes.
I remember very well the day I received six of the best with senior cane first time. It was shortly after I swiched from 6th to 7th grade. I was a little late to english lesson and Mr. Henning decided for me to get detention with writing lines. I would not accept and called him "fucking old rat" to my classe mates. And Mr. Hennig heared it! It took just a second for him to grab me and bend me over his desk in front of the class. He raised my skirt, pulled my panties down. Then he took the senior cane from the wall, came back to me and beat me 6 times full force across my naked cheeks. All my class mates wached me crying like as baby. Later I had enough time for thinking about it while writing lines in detention.

showers

Every wednesay and every saturday we all had to go to the large bathroom, 10 girls at a time. We had to strip nude to get a shower - no exceptions.  If we were lucky we got shower at the beginning when water was still warm. Later when warm water was over it turned pretty cold - not a pleasure in autumn or winter.

Once Sarina, a younger girl, was freezing and she refused to take the cold shower. So she was forced by two older girls. They took her to the shower room and washed her with extra cold water. Then the girl was scrubbed with  rough brushes all over her body. I felt so sorry for her, she was just freezing and now she got punished for that. Sarina was screaming all the time and her body was quite red afterwards. She never refused showering again.

In present I have used this treatment on my son too - with very good success.

about "The Good House"

It was a large institution, about 200 kids lived here, boys and girls seperated in different buildings. All between age 6 up to age 18. Each group of 20 had a governess that was responsible for cohabitation, chores, study and behavior of the girls.
Some of the older girls supported a governess supervising a group of younger girls. 

We had to obey the governess and the supporting girls - that's the first rule!

We lived in rooms of up to 6 kids of same age. The room always has to be clean and tidy - second rule!

We always had to be well dressed and on time in class or other appointments - third rule!

There were a lot more, every breaking a rule would be punished.

a poor beginning

I don't know my parents, as long as I remember I was a foster child. Until the age of 8 there were three foster parents caring for me. Some did well others did not. When I started school I was in a family with 4 other kids - not very easy for me to get along. Very strict parents and naughty brothers gave me a hard time. There was almost no day without the brothers battling me or beeing scolded by the father. Sometimes I got spanked for lying or bad behaviour.

At school I passed 1st and 2nd grade but later I failed. Staying down a year was not a possibility for my foster father. I got trashed for my bad reports. Later they decided to sent me away. I would repeat 3rd grade living somewhere else.
When I was 8 years I came to the orphanage "the good house" - and it changed my life:
there were lots of house rules, a strict governess and regular discipline for disobediant boys and girls. That would be my new home for almost 10 years.