this is not fair (diary 1987/04/12)

Mr. Manion hab been ill for about 3 weeks and there were some supply teachers to teach us geography. But it was no fun with them, Mr. Manion told us little stories about foreign countries and it was very easy to learn from this. Today Our headmistress told us that he will not return to school. We will get an other teacher for the rest of the year: Mrs. Winford.
Mrs. Winford told us that she came from England and will teach us abour geography of Europe till the end of the year. At first she wanted to know how much we have learned until now. She made a test, we had to answer 20 questions about countries, rivers, mountains of different parts of the world. It was very hard to answer these questions.
She had a look at our answers and soon she started shouting at us: "No one of you has and idea of geography! What did you learn until now?" She was very angry. She told us that she would do a second test one week later. We should better study hard for this test and everyone who fails it will get punished.
Oh my god! How could she do that? We did not know much about geography because Mr. Manion always told us stories and now we would have to know every bloody mountain in the world? Thats not fair. I hope I will pass the test next week.

One week later
We all have read much about geography, we could name the highes mountains and the longest rivers all over the world. We were very happy to have learned so much.
Mrs. Winford came to the classroom and she carried a strong cane in her hand. When I saw her, my heart started beating wild and I was freezing immediate. She startet our lesson with this test she talked about one week ago. We had to name all countries of Africa including their capitals. I had no idea, in face i could tell eight countries but none of their capitals. Some of my classmates were in the same situation.

Mrs. Winford checked our answers and really, two girls had written down all countries and all capitals, some had left out one or two cities but just three girls including me failed the test by far.
All girls were allowed to go but we had to stay here. Mrs. winford told us about her disappointment about us and how lazy a girl must be if she has one week time to learn and fail this simple test. She told us each of us will get one stroke on the bottom for each wrong or left out answer. She started with Cynthia, she had to bend over her desk and got 21 strokes. She screamed and cried like a baby but Mrs. Winford gave all of them quite hard on her buttocks. Jane and Marie got 34 each, they had no correct answer to the capitals but they named all countries. At the end it was my turn. Mrs. Winford said thet she has never seen such a bad result. Just 5 countries were right and 3 of the countries I wrote down were on different continents. This would result in 52 strokes for missing countries and 57 strokes for missing capitals and 3 strokes for the wrong countries.
My legs got soft and I was shaking. I had to bend over like the other girls and Mrs. Winford lifted my skirt. She told me that its very hard to get 112 strokes so she will devide it into three parts. The first 40 strokes she would give me now, the second 40 I would receive tomorrow and the last 32 I would receive the next day. I started crying and tried to beg for mercy. "No mercy", she said, "you habe had about one week to study. Thats the punishment for beeing lazy, and its well deserved!"
She started to whip my naked cheeks hard with her cane. She had a little break after 10 hard stroked to let me calm down. Then she continued caning my soft skin, one hard stroke a second. After a second break I received again 10 strokes. I cried and shouted and stuggled but it did not habe effect. "the last 10 strokes", she said, "full force, to make you think about your behaviour". And I got it, she caned my cheeks and the upper part of my legs until thick red stripes and welts appeared.
At the end she told me to come to her room tomorrow at 5pm to get the next  part of my punishment. Then she left the room.

supply teacher (diary 1987/03/17)

Mr. Jones, our maths teacher, is ill for some weeks. For substitution a maths supply teacher from boy school comes every tuesday and thursday to teach us, its Mr. Henson.

When he came to us today he told us that he would not tolerate talking during the lessons. We have not ever seen Mr. Henson before and were very nervous when he started. He talked very quickly about algebra, he filled the black board and most of us did not understand.
Mindy asked her neighbour something about it and she laughed about the answer. Mr. Henson turned around, watched out for the giggling girl and recognized Mindy in the back of the room. He quickly walked to her told her to stand up and bend over. All of us were astonished! Mindy did what she was told and she got a heavy stroke with the belt Mr. Held in his hand. "I told you not to talk during my lesson" he said and returned to his desk in front. Mindy was so surprised rubbing her burning butt. All of us were very calm now following Mr. Hensons explanation.
I hope that Mr. Jones, our regular teacher, will return to school soon.

the quiet room

There was a rumour that in the basement of our school house would be an empty room called "the quiet room".
For very serious offences a girl could be locked up there for detention. We did not know much about it - until this day.
An older girl - Monica - escaped from the orphanage two weeks ago. All staff looked for her, they checked every room in the houses. She was not found, so police was informed. Eight days later Monica was caught stealing food in the grocery and so she was taken back to us by the police. She came to "the quiet room" for 3 days.
Later she told us that there was no bed and no chair in it. No posibility to sit down. She had to strip and stay there with no clothes, except underwear for these days. The room is empty to make the girl think over her behaviour without distracting her mind. Every morning she was allowed to go to restroom and she got some bread and water for the day. This was a punishment for running away. But she got additional punishment for stealing. The first day our headmistress came to her telling her about obeying, breaking the rules and about punishments. Monica was told to get 12 strokes by the senior cane every day she was in "the quiet room" for stealing outside the school. That means caning for 3 days in a row, alltogether 36 strokes! The canings were applied in the evening by her governess with our headmistress supervising. Monica told us that it was really hard. She showed us the marks of the cane - they lasted for about three weeks - I think.

caught smoking (diary 1989/11/12)

Yesterday when my son came home from school, he smelled like a cigarette. He did not admit having smoked, but after checking his pockets I was sure. Two packs of marlboro and a lighter appeared when i searched his bag. I remembered the time at school when I was smoking...
Getting caught at school and never admitting. But in the orphanage where I grew up strict rules were used to keep us in line. When I was caught first time in winter 1989 breaking the rules was not accepted. Our governess, Mrs Derovich took the three girls that were caught to her office. She took a little sponge for each of us and rubbed it with soap. After putting these smelly cigarettes in our mouth she will clean it up, she told us. We had to stand in a line and Mrs. Derovich soaped our mouths with this terrible sponge. We had to stand in corner for about 30 minutes, keeping this soapy sponge in mouth. One of us, Paula, was caught smoking earlier before, she got 6 strokes with a leather strap on each palm in addition.
I felt so humiliated wearing this sponge in my mouth and it was quite uncomfortable to taste the soap all the time. It took a long time I tried smoking again. So the punishment was quite effecctive in the past. I used it the same way yesterday to my son hoping he wont smoke again. His two packs of marlboro I flushed down the toilet.

extra lessons (diary 1986/02/19)

Last week Mr. Jones told us about solving algebra equations with variables. I did not understand how to calculate using letters. Lucia, helped me understanding, she is one year older than me. Last night we practiced until morning because of the math test today.
I don't know if I passed the test, it was really hard. Some of my results simply must be correct! Melanie, my friend did not feel well after this exercise. She has similar problems as me, but she did not practice that night.
Last time she failed the exam, if she does again, Mr. Jones would make her taking extra lessons. These lessons are not a pleasure at all. Its in late afternoon or evening when the other kids have spare time. These lessons are held by the older girls, which are very disrespectful to us and they often use discipline during lessons.
When I had to do extra lessons in history some weeks ago, I had to learn lots of silly things. For example 100 dates from european history. When I was asked for them I had to take off one piece of clothes per mistake I made. At the end I was there almost naked. I didn't like it, but it worked. I never will forget for example 1914-1918: first world war.

the silver necklace (diary 1988/02/12)

It was cold this day, we came from class at 5pm. It was some time left to do our homework before we left for supper. At 6:45pm on time we had to sit at our dedicated table in the dining hall. We could get some food and drinks and were allowed to eat until 7:15pm. If someone was late there was no way to get some food this evening for her.
At 6:30pm we were dressing up for dinner. Susan, the blonde girl from my room, was searching for her necklace, she liked very much. But it was not at the place where she had done it. She asked all of us if we had seen it - no one did. When Mrs. Derovich came, she told her what she was missing and Mrs. Derovich asked again. No answer.
She decided to search all our wardrobes, we had to put all our things out to be inspected. 10minutes later something fell out of Luisa's clothes. Susan recognized her necklace and took it back. It was about 7pm now, we would not get supper today. Mrs. Derovich was very angry ablout Luisa, she asked her how Susan's property could appear in her wardrobe. Luisa did not say anything.
Mrs. Derovich told her to take off her skirt and her panties. She had to bend over the table. Susan had to go for a cane. A collection of different canes have been in the headmasters office. Susan should choose one of them that would fit the offense. Some time later she returned with a very dark cane, it was about 3ft long and looked very firm. All four girls had to sit on the bed and watch while Mrs. Derovich caned poor Luisa about 15 times very hard on her naked butt. She cried like a baby, Susan smiled.

It was a very impressive experience for me. I think the combination of beeing spanked and beeing humiliated in front of the victim of the offense is very effective. I have often used this combination to my kids if they have argued. When Julia was very rude to her smaller brother he often is allowed to choose an implement that I use to discipline her. And the other way round. Its amazing to watch each of them picking that implement which he or she hates most.

to the movies (diary 1988/05/14)

At the weekend we were allowed to go out. We could go to the small city 4 miles away. It was a one hour walk or 15 minutes by bike. When we got a bike from school we had to bring it back until 8pm. My friend Melanie and I went to cinema by bike once. We watched "Hansel and Gretel", the movie was very new in this year.  We liked it very much.
On our way back to school I unfortunately had a flat tyre, we walked then. So we were back at school about one hour late. We tried to creep in very silently, putting the bikes behind the school house. I found a window on first floor standing open, so we could entered the house tiptoe to upstairs and to our room. Mrs. Derovich was already there watching out for us and waiting. Strongly bending her beloved rattan cane she looked very angry. We apologized for beeing late and she accepted our apology about the flat tyre but "rules must not be broken" she said. For beeing late we would not be caned, but we had to clean all school bikes in our spare time the following week.
It seemed to me Mrs. Derovich was somehow disappointed...

writing a diary

One of my room mates, Bettie had some trouble with staying dry at night. She sometimes wetted her bed, in particular when she got trouble during classes. Until age of 10 Mrs. Derovich thought Bettie needed a srict hand to stop this problem. She made her writing lines and gave her lots of extra work. But on some days a month Bettie still wetted her bed again. Later she had to wear diapers while sleeping. It did not solve the problem. Then she got very long handspankings over her knee. Everytime Bettie cried like a baby and promised never pee in her bed again. But it did not work.
Mrs. Derovich decided to consult a doctor. Two times a week Bettie had this appointment. He talked a lot to her and gave her a diary where she could write down her fears to get them out of her head. In fact writing diary was not allowed - I never understood this rule - but here it was a medical treatment, I think. Some months Bettie used the diary and she did not wet her bed again. At the end the doctor took her book and throw it away, so Betties fears went away and never came back.
This time I wanted to write a diary, too. Next opportunity to get a diary was some days later when I was shopping, I bought it.

five girls in a room

Most of my time in the orphanage I shared a room with four other girls. That was my best friend Melanie. She was a cute girl with brown hair, dark eyes and just one month older than me. She was one of my classmates, too. Another one was Bettie. Bettie was a bit younger, not very tall but quite heavy. She was very clumsy, all the time she did something wrong, forgot or lost something. She was okay but nobody really liked her. The other two girls were a bit strange. Both about one year older than me. Luisa a very naughty girl always broke the rules. She often run away, she smoked outside the school and visited partys in the city. She often was punished but she did not stop doing that. The other one, Susan was a real bitch. She was very nasty, always she told lies or she was tricking other kids.But she looked really good. Susan was a very good friend to the older girls which supported our governess keeping us in line.
In 1986 summer I was very hot - about 36 degree Celsius. I was 12 years this time. Susan told us that the headmaster decided it was too hot for classes, we could go swimming. Very happy we went to the lake some miles away for a funny day. Susan did not come with us. She was in class room - we got to know some hours later... When Mrs. Derovich, our governess, asked we told her everything, but Susan denied. We had bend over the desk, Mrs. Derovich lifted our skirts and dropped our panties. Each of us got 12 strokes with the cane for staying away from classes and 12 stokes for lying to her.

school uniforms

We got school uniforms that we had to wear all day. Uniforms were collected every week for laundry. We had to take care that not all clothing got dirty before laundry day. It was not funny sitting in classroom with a dirty skirt for example.
When I was in the age of 7 it happened to me. We played outside in autumn in rainy and muddy conditions. Next day in maths lesson Mr. Jones recognized my skirt showing dirty spots. He immediatedly stopped lesson and asked for the reason. I could not really find a good one. Mr. Jones made me taking off the skirt and continue all the day without it. It was terribly embassing for me to sit there or walk around in panties... Fortunately my panties have been totally clean. I would have to take them off too, if it was not.

One of my class mates - it was Paula - had to do this some weeks later. She played soccer in the break and her clothes was very dirty afterwards. During Mr. Jone's lesson Paula had to take off her shoes, t-shirt, skirt and panties. She was not allowed to leave the classroom for changing clothes. So she must stay the whole day almost naked. She was so ashamed, she cried all the time. I did not really feel sorry for her, she often argued with others, she deserved it.